Little Seeping Thoughts

Sometimes you drift into things you’ve wanted to avoid for a long, long time. You want to just find out a little bit more, go that little bit further, when your mind says to stop, but you really can’t stop. You know it’ll burn you eventually, but its just sweet enough to take the burns. They’re thoughts that just keep seeping through your system, slowly, relentlessly.

You had vowed to never take that road again, and you can already see the futility it is leading to, and you start expecting things you know won’t surface. And you wait, and you wait.

And you get the same outcomes. Instead, Peace out, don’t wait, burn the bridges behind you, and if you had burned them already, don’t try to create them again.

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Home [again]..not really

Blogging has generally been on now/off then for some while, my apologies.

Life, the daily course of events, the people we meet,  the places we go, the good times, the not so great ones, the laughs, the fights, the comforts, the fears, their reasons, basically everything; keeps doing circles, seems to move on, but ever so slowly. There are times, times of your life, but on other times, they just don’t seem right.

I don’t exactly read too much into fate/destiny et al, but sometimes, just the course of events makes you ponder about why certain things are the way they are, how could they have been better, or did you turn them to the worse, because you were selfish.

Sometimes, I don’t easily get what people try to do with themselves. What makes them happy? Maybe its just the self-centric thing, but some decisions become almost too incomprehensible, too difficult to accept easily. And then, once again the usual cycle of explaining, understanding, the non-understanding, again explaining, and making a very confused, not-exactly-a-yes nod follows. I try non-interference, it becomes ignorance,  i try self-confinement, that becomes attitude, i say fuck it, becomes fuck off.

Makes me realize comic relief is probably the best thing that ever came out. The lighter moments, however insignificant, almost always make life easier, alleviate the pains, and bring back the happiness, however short-lived. Some of the best (recent) comic relief I’ve come across (again this is no order of nothing):

1. The Mock Swine Flu story, my sis told me

2. The Chronicles of Hostel-3 stud(appa)

3. The Ali G show, Borat, Bruno

4. Sarcasm (always works)

5. The Hostel-3 lobby Bak*****

6. The use of Dark Seer by Leon

7. Mumbai touch-ups

8. The time around college et al

9. Lots’ve things actually, invisible, easily lost with time, yet significant, as soon as something sprouts them up, again.

Keep Healthy. Take Care. There’s a lots’ve life out there. Most of it not easy. Live. Relieve.

Down Memory Lane…

Sometimes, there’s parts to your story, you want to keep to yourself, things you don’t want to face, but you have to eventually, when your friends had that bad day as well, but you’re still making it worse; but there are other parts; the beautiful ones, the innocent ones, that lighter side that you wish would come back, and suddenly one day, it does!!

Sometimes, all these parts, the good and the bad ones, you come across them all in a single day ( or more like 26 hours). I had that day yesterday..

I learned:

1.) Save the hurting for later

If you could keep your sanity when people were judgmental, a straight face; while on the inside, the arrogance was too much to take, and the T word has been played with too many times, be the brave guy.

2.)It can always get better

A single childhood joke, that small detail, the kiddy games, shared, between those friends from then, and voila, it does.

3.)The true friend

Talk, share, ask, laugh, listen,conspire, inspire and speak a lots…your punching bag!

4.)Superlative

You’re not the only one who had this day, or at least had significant action in theirs, there’s a place to stop, turn, and take another road, because this road, there’s too many crashes along it, and the hurting dwells again..

The beautiful contradiction problem!

Thinking about thinking of you
Summertime think it was June
Yeah think it was June

I guess, somewhere down the line, it does come to self-examination. There’s a reason for it, and its called insecurity. How can I keep on being the same everyday, what forces us to play cogs on the wheel, why are we so redundant?

Laying back, head on the grass
Children grown having some laughs
Yeah having some laughs

Its interesting, but if I may be allowed to manipulate Coelho, “God rarely reveals the future, and if he does, all that comes of it is the associated deja vu.” Do I believe, whatever doesn’t concern you, is not for you? I guess yeah. Have i been largely ignorant, uninterested in whatever went on? Am i a sinner for caring?

Made me feel like the one
Made me feel like the one
The one
Made me feel like the one
Made me feel like the one
The one

The signs lately do indicate that tendency of mine. To add to it, i’ve been labelled prejudiced and cold.
Maybe it’s for real. But it’s just me, dats how i role.

Drinking back, drinking for two
Drinking with you
And drinking was new

So what were the things that made me this. I guess, for starters, i always felt, that my only reason for existence was to be the king of the world. That i was the center around which the world was supposed to revolve, that everyone around was just a small part in my story.

Sleeping in the back of my car
We never went far
Needed to go far

And that vision shattered, I lost things, I shudnt have….

Made me feel like the one
Made me feel like the one
The one
Made me feel like the one
Made me feel like the one
The one

So what’s the beauty of self-contradiction? Is it about opening your eyes?

I don’t know where we are going now
I don’t know where we are going now

Do i finally recognize the stranger in myself? Do i see the need to change? Do i understand what i missed?

Wake up cold coffee and juice
Remembering you
What happened to you?

Maybe its too late. Or maybe thats just a fear? What if i cud go back? How does one go back in time? I’d love to go back in time…..

I wonder if we’ll meet again
Talk about us instead
Talk about why did it end

Its not that i regret being where i am, but i regret being this thing that i am. I believe i owe an apology to all those i wronged. But should i apologize? Do i apologize?

Made me feel like the one
Made me feel like the one
The one
Made me feel like the one
Made me feel like the one
The one

NO SCREW U PEOPLE, U’RE STILL A PART OF MY STORY!

I don’t know where we are going now
I don’t know where we are going now

The above lines were written under the influence of a splendid track by The Stereophonics, namely Dakota, and to the author’s best knowledge, none of it is true. If u belvd. them, then he did you in!! A beautiful contradiction…. Do listen to it, the music will only make it better.

So take a look at me now
So take a look at me now

Review:Super Sunday(24/03/2008) was superb!

I was supposed to fly back to Ranchi early morning.The Malaysian Grand Prix.The big 4 of the premiership clashed in the evening.There are a few moments i’d love to share here:

->At around 13.00 IST,my flight was closing in on its destination(Ranchi).We had been flying in bright sunshine,above a thick layer of cloud ever since we left Delhi.I knew, once near Ranchi, the plane would need to descend and pierce the clouds.The anticipation of the moment was too great for me to fall asleep,n God ,it was a really mesmerizing experience,i literally saw the airplane pierce the clouds,and the mist form outside my window,if only i’d been allowed to photograph it,but no electronic devices allowed inside…..:(

->The Malaysian Grand Prix was always gonna be difficult for Mclaren after they were penalized in qualifying,couldn’t catch the action(i ws travelling), but Kimi Raikkonen(Ferrari) won. Fisichella came 12th in what can be called an improved performance by Force India, though my reservations on Sutil still hold after another dismal performance.

-> Finally, the big one

Match 1: Man Utd. vs Liverpool

The game showed the class Man Utd have especially in defense, considering the fact that Torres wasn’t even a shadow of his usual self,constantly under pressure from Ferdinand. Surely Mascherano’s sending off was a pivotal point, although Utd. were firmly in control, both before and after the controversial decision. I would probably go with the red card,but then i’ve generally made no fuss about my dislike for Liverpool.The 3 points mean that Utd. are now firm favourites to win the league, and probably deserve to,considering the quality of attacking football they’ve displayed all season.

Result:Man Utd 3-0 Liverpool

Match 2: Chelsea vs Arsenal

A scorcher of a football game at the Bridge,considering especially the importance the game held for the 2 London rivals.The result was absolutely fantastic (for me and other Chelsea supporters out there), but Arsenal played better until they scored the opening goal in the 59th minute. Chelsea’s love-hate manager Avram Grant knew he was in for battering if he lost this one,even more so because it would bring an end to the legacy laid down by Mourinho, wherein they haven’t lost a home league game in 4 years and 1 month. He brought in Anelka and Belleti in the 70th min. 3 minutes later,a long ball from the latter eventually resulted in the Chelsea equalizer courtesy the ever so reliable Drogba. And Drogba scored the Chelsea winner in the 82nd minute from an Anelka flick-on.The final whistle meant Arsenal have collected only 4 out of the 15 points possible in the last 5 games.But Chelsea have now leapfrogged them to second place in the league……way to go blues.

Result:Chelsea 2-1 Arsenal

(blue is the colour)

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I Hv no pets!!!!!

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Well, i’m new 2 bloggin nd i hv no pets(so many bloggers seem 2 hv them)

Wat u see in da pic is not the ocean,not a river,not a lake……….

its just water on a rain day in mumbai streamin around my place in Mumbai

yeah dats where i live along with another 10 million ppl….all we do in mum. is roam around da place,day n nite nt interested in 1 another??

Well guess dats hw it shud be…..

Nw in the matter ov pets….i never really planned 4 ny pets(dogs,cats,chameleons,cockroaches??)..nno,nt dat i detest animals,but dun like them a lot….no1 at my place does,guess dats only rite(tho my mom who lived in UP during her childhood,does tell me tales of a cat,cows,a dog,2 rabbits that she had as pets(nt cows as pets) during the various places she lived at around UP,nanaji had a transferrable job….).Why i took up pets 2day,idk really,probably had 2 get started wid sumthin…

In mumbai u dun c many animals nywayz…..nw i’m nt alwayz in mum…..infact more dan mumbai,i live in Ranchi(along wid another million ppl i guess).Nw ranchi is very different frm mumbai,animals u can find dere a lots of ’em around my col. campus(cows mostly).

Mumbai has da same climate throughout,Ranchi is Oven n Refrigeratoooooor….

Mumbai has da sea,Ranchi has da trees…

Mumbai has family(n frnds 2),Ranchi has an army(!!) ov frnds..

I like both places,changes may not enlighten u,they sure can excite u.

I’ll be writing more on Hostel(nt da muvis) life,frnds,India,Ranchi,Mumbai,(pets??,no!),Football(Soccer s’il vous plait)

I guess i’m born(2days ma b’day nyhwz) den 4 bloggin, c ya!!